Tuesday, August 20, 2013

Who Cares?

Who Cares?

Do you know anyone who doesn't care about anyone or anything?  My guess is they are covering up something they've long since forgotten and don't want to re-visit.  And believe or not, that's OK.  Don't judge,  just observe - it's not contagious.  Only stimulating to the degree you let it affect you either positively or negatively.  

Whenever I find myself in the venerable company of the "who cares" pit of seduction, I am always startled a bit at first.  I usually rally pretty quick these days, but I've been known to get blindsided sometimes and find myself struggling in energetic quicksand as I come to terms with the truth that some of us really just don't care!

 What happens to you when you find yourself smack in the middle of a scenario with someone who radiates lack of this magnitude? Does it make you want to go into a tirade of who do they think they are  anyway? Or does it push you into your interior and make you send out prayers of grace-filled appreciation  and joy for what you value and hold dear.

No matter how we respond, that is all that is in our control. 

Our real solution is a returning to and a remembrance of an abiding and deep love for life and ourselves. 

 Not the "kind of" love that is born out of narcissistic and neurotic distress and neediness, but the mature love that is devoted and expansive and includes rather than excludes all life.

So remember the next time you bump into that casual and disconcerting "who cares" attitude, remind yourself. . .

 You care. Yes you do! 

Then thank yourself, applaud wildly, for being aware enough to realize that only you can author and drive your attitudes and beliefs. 

Now that's contagious!

Darkness cannot drive out darkness.
Only Light can do that.

~ Martin Luther King Jr. ~

xox Rhonda

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Commander of Kindness . . .

It only takes a split second to move into that graciousness zone of genuine kindness.

Most everyone I know is generally kind and caring.  However one day it took me by complete surprise.  And in the elementary school's car pool lane to boot!

A dear friend of mine was having a tough time with her adolescent daughter.  She was acting out, threatening to quit school and not respecting anyone including herself.

My friend was thinking herself a failure in the mothering department of life, big time! Even though she had three other kids who were honest (well most of the time), caring and responsible.  Anyone who has been at their wits end with a kid misbehaving while taking down everyone around them can relate I'm sure. The feelings of helplessness and at times hopelessness sneak in and make you start wondering, what the heck, what's happening here.

Anyway, one hot spring morning, we were waiting patiently for our turn to drop off the kids at the school's front door (we rode together in her car most days). Suddenly the director and commander of  car pool traffic bolted across the lane and knocked on the car window. She was looking quite serious. As I rolled down the window her voice shot through the car like a torpedo headed straight for it's target.

"I just have to tell you something Mrs. Markham," she said. " I want you to know your son, he's in kindergarten right?  Well he is one of the nicest, kindest and caring children I have every had the honor of knowing! He stood up to a bully the other day for another child.  Never blinked an eye.  Well you can bet I congratulated him on being such a brave boy! When I asked him why he did that for a 2nd grader - mind you - he looked me straight in the face and said, I'm not brave, it's just the right thing to do.  Nobody has the right to push anybody around and pick on them. Mrs. Markham, thanks for being such a great mom, Nicky is an absolute joy to be around."

And with that, she spun around and moved us up to the drop off exit and the kids jumped out of the car.  As the cars were honking their horns behind us, anxious to know what was taking so long.  I looked up at my friends face.  She was balling her eyes out and trying to catch her breath. All she could sniffle was, that was the kindest thing anyone has ever said to me!

Guess Mrs. Markham didn't get an F for failure in the mothering department after all.


Three cheers for torpedoes of kindness!

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Critical Value

Could it just be . . .
that we want to be told the truth?

I have to say, for the majority of us, I don't think so!!! If it were true, I kinda feel there would be more truth telling in the government and media and advertising and and and - the list is endless.

We all individually have to stand up for the truth, whatever that may mean to us. Once that happens, I do believe things gotta change a little bit at a time, for the beauty and glory of altruism alone.

Yes, I do believe the truth is subjective based upon our perceptions.  However - if we speak our truth, what ever that may be - it is authentic based upon our beliefs etc etc etc. If we could all do that, in the moment we could at least begin a dialogue that will create a continuum that can create a process of engagement of real and critical value.

And yes, listening with respect and concentrated acceptance of another truth is also part of this. (That's a whole other topic of discussion.)

My main concern is around allowing and giving ourselves permission to be open, to know who we are, what we believe and what we have to say.  We've hid and refused to listen to and own our voices for way too long. The state of our government,  conditions of our public schools, financial systems are mirroring back to us that we have not taken responsibility and stood solidly up for what is important to us.

We must search our souls, cherish our truth and unleash our voices and be heard.

Each and every one of us, has got what it takes to make a difference. It's time.

xox, That's my truth!

PS What's yours?

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Invision Decision

Gotta say, when it comes to making decisions, I used to be a muller.

Drenching my mind with the what ifs, how's this gonna work -  or the BIG KAHUNA, who might find out if I made the wrong one!

I've come along way since those days.

Now don't get me wrong, I still mull, just not as long. You see, I was annoying myself so much one day - not being  able to just get done what I had to do.  That I sat down, made a list and titled it . . .

Now or Never!

Under the NOW I wrote down all of the things that were important to me at that very moment. In the NEVER section I came up with a list of all of the things I don't want in my life and don't find personally attractive.

It worked.  When I defined what was important and what was not.  I made that decision in record time.
And my little list only took 5 minutes tops!

So I dare you mullers, get with your  NOW OR NEVERS!

Be bold, brave, outrageous and step out of the old mold of mulling!

Your decisions await your presence.

Great love,

Monday, December 5, 2011

The Unbroken Wishbone

I heard a very heartwarming story this week that gives me great hope that we are finally moving away from the competitive - dog eat dog style mentality - to a more genuine, inclusive way of thinking and being in the world.

So here goes the tale. A wonderful woman I know was in her kitchen the day after Thanksgiving, putting away holiday dishes and the silverware she only uses for special occasions. As she was in the last stages of tidying up she came across the turkey's wishbone that traditionally was celebrated and wished upon straight away. Smack between their family feast and dessert.

How did that get overlooked? She found herself deeply questioning what she should do with the wishbone. Should she save it for next year? Break it herself? Wait until this evenings dinner to partake in the tradition - a day late?

In her uncertainty she called out to her teenage son (the only one home at the time) and asked him if he wanted to break the wishbone with her. His answer was very quick and most surprisingly thoughtful - the REAL answer this mother was needing.

Her son retorted that he did not wish to partake in any ceremony or celebration that left someone empty handed or shorted in any way. "We're creating a new world Mom - you just forgot." He then added with sincerity - "thanks for asking anyway."

So in the spirit of love,

Have a wonder-full holiday season.


PS Thought you might want to check out this great foundation that MAKES wishes come true.

Giving and Receiving in Balance. ;-) Get involved in something this year. Your community needs you.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Move It

Don't you just love learning something new?

Finding that sweet spot or breaking through and having a huge insight can invigorate us and always makes me feel more alive.

When I sometimes feel undecided and am looking for an answer or wanting to really understand and master something. Most often the true resolution or path is right in front of me. However, quite often I don't see it as the answer. My mind and emotions move this way and that way and finally when I give up the struggle, I see it - the plain and simple solution. It was here with me all along, patiently waiting my acknowledgement and recognition.

The truth is, we're not ready until we're ready. That's one of the most glorious parts about being individuated humans and spiritual beings. Our experiences are our experiences alone and truth can only come to us - alone. We are the ones that get to process our lives as we see fit.

My belief is our truth is always with us, only a breathe and nod away.

May you find the grace of your new discoveries exposing your brilliance one after another.

With love,

P.S. A tip for your next epiphany: It does help to get out of your own "little" way. The Universe knows how to deliver big!

Monday, November 21, 2011

Who's The Boss Of You?

Interesting topic of conversation don't you think?

With mass media blaring in our face on any given day, everyday - at the rate of non stop 24 hour cycles - with endless marketing pitches and pharmecutical drug disclosures - not to mention "Reality TV". We the people, the public, humanity - are being bombarded by other people's opinions and observations of what we should do, say and think as well as what we should not. :-)

I am especially intrigued by the so called "transparency" of drug companies and their disclosures of all lethal and potent side effects of their drugs. As their monologues move through a commercial framework, we learn to tune out the dictation - which results in nothing else but pure apathy. And as apathy enters the picture - a sense of numbness sneaks in and creates a state of reception for all the nonsense that we are privy to on a daily basis.

How are you creating your decisions and what are they being founded upon?

Are our lives being crafted by others? Have we even thought about that possiblity?

I say, turn on your tuner and pay attention to the lines of conversation you are en-training with and BE SURE, MAKE SURE, it's something you want to ingest.

And . . .
If not - be aware that you, we all have a choice. Be aware of YOUR choices, thoughts, ideas. Then pay attention - peak your awareness - focus in on your voice - and CLAIM IT! This doesn't suggest that you be insensitive to others - it suggests that as we own the authority of our own life - we reflect silently - and sometimes vocally the ACTUALIZED ability for others to do the same.

Even in the environment of your friends, family and clients, are you/we taking on their perceptions way too much?

Perhaps it's TIME TO CLEANSE your media- thought- idea palette and MAKE A DATE with yourself. What do I think? What is really important to me? What are my values? What am I learning in this process of discovering my rights?

And the golden question, WHO REALLY IS THE BOSS OF ME?

With loving devotion,

P.S. Validate your own individuality, just for you, it's one of your GREATEST GIFTS!